Average modern Asian women had fought hard to have both world at her advantages, most have a fulfilling and rewarding career and satisfactory family commitment, being more expressive and emotional in nature, most had little transitional difficulties in their midlife turning point, shifting from focus on career back to family as per needed and enjoying the payoffs of a family well brought up; strong maternal bonding with the children, well extended network of supporting structures from families and friends, dedicated salary earning man maintaining the basic non luxuries lifestyles. Unlike their counterparts, man had a more challenging battle to fight when they come to the crossroad of middle age phase majority at age 50 and beyond. There are three early warning signs and ways to mitigate the side effects. First, the degradation of physical attributes; second, frequently being challenged and losing out to the younger peers in workplace, last but not least; family role as husband and father is becoming increasingly displaced and non-rewarding.
Rapid weight gains in the middle part of the body are one obvious indicator of mid-life approaching as exercising didn’t bring the same level of results as before and not uncommon sport injuries often prevent one in continue their favorite sport activities, another pushing factor is the never ending socializing events where alcoholic and excess food intakes are inevitable. The usual good shape and charms are losing its allures once man past 50 unless exceptional cares and precautions are applied.
Losing out to the younger generations in workplace is another tell tale signs as due to heavier family commitment and other priorities middle age man can’t compete on the same terms of times and concentration and it’s not uncommon one had to report to younger superiors with bruised ego and pride. Younger colleagues had much higher level of zest and dedication to excel on the job as their number one priority and this might had had left the seniors felt threatened, uneasy and disrespected.
Last but not least is the weakening of positions within the family, relationship based on authority and fear running thinner and thinner and no true respects and strong bonding between one another including the spouse at the time when the middle age man can indeed use more of the strength of loving and affirmative relationship from family as he can’t draw as much as before from the job.
So, what can we do about it? Man needs to be more self-fish and invest on the things that matter the most for their long term benefits of wide time horizon of 20 or even 30 years ahead. Taking a lesson or two from the proven more superior ladies who had much lesser problems juggling reasonably well between both family and work. Man can also accomplish the same goal and emerge as a winner through the mid-life stages.
First thing first, acknowledge the aging process is inevitable and take steps to plan for it, be realistic on how much satisfaction one can draw from the career which is not without boundaries, the best place to gain solid sense of belonging, loves, significant and valued are from our own family who are always there for you before, now and even in future. Do not let the factors of fear crippling our capabilities of managing well the mid life crisis, take actual step to participate actively in the upbringing of children to build strong and robust ties for future sense of comforts and minimum regrets as the window of opportunities is rather narrow, exercise regularly and be humble enough to acknowledge younger generation’s strength and work together with them without much of the element of ego and pride, its just a job at the end of the days and all of the colleagues across all age group are there to get the things done and to earn a salary.
In addition, strive hard to achieve true excellence in our respective roles and responsibility as this will draw true respects and admiration and achieving highest level of self-fulfilling prophecies; most accurate accountant, most hard working janitor, most friendly bus driver, most responsible executive. Avoid falling into the endless abyss of power struggling in office, always place the family needs with highest priority, call our wife daily at work,be open minded and hold strong interest in new things, learn a new trade and make ourselves a valuable asset to colleagues, friends, relatives, children and spouse. Be there for the children, as if we put a dollar figures into all these, it’s indeed a wise investment as they finally will pay-off handsomely with almost zero or rather minimum risks.
In summary, average Asian man are being stereotyped into typical role models of the breadwinner, putting 100% of resources into the career and overlooked the actual needs of the family having this misconception that wealth can address all things. Gladly more and more modern man are being blessed into taking active role of fathering as their counterparts are climbing up the corporate ladders not uncommonly much higher than the man themselves contemporary father are finally gaining the ground traditionally monopolized by women. However, one must be able to ditch the male superiority complex to take the full advantage. Maybe if the man plays the cards well, the average lifespan can be as compatible as the women as we will have a chance to enjoy the full benefits of an extensive supporting network from work, family, friends and relatives.
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